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I thought it would be interesting to have a woman in her mid-forties being portrayed as desirable and desired, because the world is full of these women and yet we so rarely see them on television.
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Barred: The Ready Penny Take 2
When: Friday, 8:15
I’ve been threatening to crash the Jackson Heights Dads monthly meetup ever since I first found out about the event where neighborhood men with children can let off steam and bond. It rotates from Legends, Espresso 77, to Ready Penny. But it wasn’t until two of the five member Jackson Heights Ladies Cotillion (JHLC) a loose social club that has organically formed to primarily drink wine and watch Feud, also decided it was a good idea.
There was a foil tray of wings. There was a porkpie hat. There was also a bun/ponytail hybrid. The bulk of the dads were seemingly under 37 but there was one who looked like a short David Cross in a baseball cap. I did take creep shots and a non-middle-aged me would post them but now I’m mature and have good judgment.
The bartender, an Irish woman definitely over 40, took a shining to the JHLC, mostly I suspect because we brought our glasses back to the bar rather than leaving them strewn on tables, and gave us a free round of drinks. She also referred to the dads as “ladies” to insult them, which was funny instead of being offensive to real ladies.
LIke clockwork, by 11pm the dads had all but dispersed.
Age appropriate? There was a woman at least 50 by herself at the bar, yes.
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Barred : The Queens Kickshaw
When: Friday, 5:30-ish
This was the Friday before Easter, a long time ago at this point, and I was playing hooky naively thinking I could get a whole leg of lamb at an Astoria butcher two days before a big fat Greek holiday. There had been a lot of ticket-taking and line-standing that afternoon and I’m not really someone who enjoys going from place to place to pick up provisions like a a good food blogger. Give me a giant supermarket any day.
Going to Astoria, where I also have a periodic doctor’s appointment, is often an excuse to have a drink or two since it’s the closest neighborhood that has non-dive, non-Irish bars geared toward other demographic groups than Latino men, though it’s not all that close as I always forget when it takes 30 minutes on a subway plus a long walk or 30 minutes on two subways. Queens Kickshaw isn’t really even a bar, though there are roughly 10 counter seats.
Originally, I was alone, as usual, drinking while old and female, and then a few drinks in I realized two solo women had sat on my left and after talking for a while, that we had three decades represented: 25, 36, 44. The youngest woman, Mexican, (which I only point out because I never assume anyone Latina is Mexican in NYC) grew up in Queens, was a veteran of the service industry (she was friends with all the staff) and was now working at a medical office. The older woman looked no older, cute, midwestern, blonde with an undercut, and was telling Tinder tales about polyamorous relationships and dating bisexual men. She turned out to be an E.R. doctor, which impressed the hell out of the receptionist. Me too, though I didn’t show it. I have no math and science friends, nor hang out with any women in traditional, respectable professions. It was one of those situations where upon leaving you all say “connect with me on Instagram” or trade cards, but by the next day it’s all forgotten.
My hands turned blue while remaining warm to the touch as they do once or twice per year with no explanation. My doctors have been no help and this doctor drinking rose cider had no ideas either.
Was I carded? That’s pretty much a thing of the past. I might have to get rid of this category.
Age Appropriate? Yes, but no one my age was present.
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Screen Time: Twin Peaks Return Take 2
Sorry to be so Twin Peaks-centric but when Laura Dern appears as previously unseen Diane, smoking and drinking a martini, you can’t let that slide.
I thought the Bang Bang Bar would be the coolest fictional place to have a drink.
But now Max Von’s Bar is a contender. Plus, you can smoke indoors?
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In my Northwest indie-ness isolation, there were a lot of ‘90s bands I was aware of but didn’t listen to. I mean, you had to go out and buy records vs. streaming a few hits online. Helium fell into that category.
Last week, though, I spotted more than a few Mary Timony snapshots while scrolling through my middle-aged social media since she’s on tour playing Helium songs. She did not look young. She didn’t look old either. She did look awesome with a guitar, in her t-shirt and choker.
Coincidentally or maybe not, last week I also read about the gross food aesthetic in pop culture on The Hairpin and one example was a video by Ex Hex, helmed by Mary Timony, I can’t remember the last time I saw a woman in her mid-40s in a music video just like it was a normal thing and not some ‘80s-era Tina Turner comeback or Cher continuing to chug along.
(Source: https://www.youtube.com/) -
IN HOLLYWOOD, WOMEN OVER 40 ARE RARELY THE HEROINE — EVEN OF THEIR OWN STORIES
A few days after bingeing on The Keepers, I found myself recalling the doc with a smile thanks to the graceful aging of many of its protagonists. I’ve spent the better part of the past decade worrying about getting older. Pop culture — which I’m steeped in as a critic — just might be the worst lens through which to consider female aging, and the films and TV shows on the subject that stick out in my mind foretell nothing good.
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That’s a rough-looking 49, Nora. I guess she’s had an aging ten years (which I just discovered was the intended time frame). I mean, she was supposedly blasted with a bunch of radiation. Plus, Australia is a sunny place.
Based on the story line, I was guessing the character was supposed to be somewhere in her early-50s, but really looked more like an earthy, fit late-50s who was aging well.
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Screen Time: Twin Peaks, The Return
For reasons not even clear to me, I watched Twin Peaks for
the first time in 2015. I was close to a legal adult, living in the Pacific
Northwest when it debuted, so I have no excuse. I might have been scarred when
I tried to watch Blue Velvet on the only TV in my family’s house and my dad
woke up and wandered into the living room right at the Kyle MacLachlan hiding in
the closet scene and I had to quickly turn it off.
No matter, Twin Peaks is back and Mädchen Amick is still
frequenting the Bang Bang Bar at 46. Looking good, doing shots, and drinking beer, Rainier in a can followed by a “pounder” (heck, yeah!) when her friends are opting for wine. I would advise against drinking wine in a roadhouse, even in a small-town in the NW where sometimes you’ll find surprisingly good beer Also, the Bang Bang Club
looks awesome and I truly wish such a venue existed.
As an aside, the women of Au Revoir Simone who got their
start in Brooklyn in the early-aughts (ugh, I said aught), and closed out
episode three, must be flirting with middle age by now, right? -
When I was 30, I thought I had everything sussed out. I thought I knew everything. Then I hit 40, and I looked back at 30 and thought, ‘What a clown. I knew nothing.’ I thought I was ancient at 40, but now I’m 50 and I realize I was really just a young woman.
Shirley Manson, while drinking martinis at Musso & Frank’s! -
The horror of “starting over at 45.”